Just Random thoughts

Well Here I am sitting in my room just thinking to myself, what have I done? Well first of all, I was a little upset about a friend who moved away. After a chat with another friend, I hope I didn't cause any problems for either one of them. I have a bad habit not telling the whole story. Sometimes I just leave some details out, because I don't want to go on with a long story and bore the other to death. I do however say things that are taken the wrong way. I do that a lot. It has caused a lot of problems with my wife, and several other people because they misinterpret what i am saying. Best thing to do is to keep my mouth shut. Which is the reason why I never actually made my blog public. It is more of a kind of journal than anything else. My personnel thoughts are written here, and the only ones who will ever read it will be the two or three people who know about it and those who stumble on to it. But who is really interested in reading boring stuff like mine? As anyone who see's this, I have zero followers and zero comments on my blogs anyway. Well, like I said, I never made it public to websites like face book. well enough of that, time to do something else other than playing on this little computer all night and morning. I'll just write more boring stuff later.

Cancer?

Well today I got off of work early as usual ( for a back stock night ), but during my time working, I noticed a girl shopping with her mother, looking at the bacon as I was restocking the shelf. Normally I don't pay much attention to our customers unless they ask me a question. Anyway, this girl caught my attention because she did not have any hair at all. My first and only thought was, cancer. I had seen lots of girls with shaved heads before, but they are usually what I call a punk rocker. This girl did not fit that image at all. She was standing in front of the precooked bacon and I can see that she was a little confused so I asked her if she needed any help at all. As turned to face me, I noticed that she was smiling, but her eyes told a different story. I saw sadness in her eyes, and for some reason, I felt it. I don't know why I felt her sadness for at all, I don't even know her nor have I ever seen her before . So I just overlooked her condition and continued with my service to her. She was a little confused about the price of a small package of precooked bacon, because there was a sells tag showing for five dollars a package. I corrected the problem and cracked a joke with her about it, telling her that we like to miss tag our product to confuse our customers. She just started laughing as I continued on with the humor, I also told her that we have another item for sell at a price for $2.97, as I pointed to an empty shelf, as I did that, I said there you go, I have nothing here for a price of $2.97. At that moment, I saw happiness fill her as she started laughing at my joke. She then tells me thank you and leaves with her mother who was also smiling at what I said. But for some reason, I can still feel her sadness as she walk away. I mumbled to myself, I wish you well and happiness. I really don't know why, I felt that way before. Some people would probably say that I am a nice guy or because I have a heart or something. Please don't think that, because I refuse to believe it. If you actually know me, then you will know what I mean. If you know my wife and ask her, she will tell you the truth about what I really am. So as the night went on, I couldn't help some of the awkwardness I felt when I was talking to this girl. There she is, with no hair, but a very beautiful face and voice, and here I am, just some guy with very long hair that nearly reaches my waist. I just wondered what she was thinking when she saw that ( if she thought anything at all ). I finally cleared my mind from it and continued to work. but of course, my depression took the better of me as the night went on. It wasn't just about the girl ( although it might of started out with her )but a lot of other things as well. Things that I just don't want to write about at this moment. Now here I am at home, writing about it here in this blog thing. I know no one will read it because I never made a big deal that I am blogging. Well I really never told anyone about it except a couple of people, but still. I am just doing this to occupy my time.